Men are from mars

My vent is why do men have to be strange. (Not all men) but they are different breeds these days.
. I know women can be like that too but we get hurt and are damaged also but I still move on. They only want you when its convenient for them at the time. They still flirt and want you up their butt and act all into you, except they have no intention on being with you. That sucks and it don't feel great. Except I will admit all day long I let it happen cause at the moment I like the attention. I know in the back of my mind he's not good or right for me but in that moment you don't care cause he's giving you what you want. I know I'm better than that. I know I'm not ugly and I know my worth but I let it happen anyway and then end up getting upset and hating myself for letting it happen.

Not Your Average Girl

I wrote this poem a few years ago.

"NOT YOUR AVERAGE GIRL"

I'm not your average girl
I like many types of things
I'm different in all types of ways
I differ from day to day
Most days I'm very happy
Some days I want to cry
I'm not your average girl and
I can tell you why.

I can be a country girl
Or very rock-n-roll
From 80's to hip hop
That's how I like to roll

Some people say I'm different
From others in every kind of ways
I'm not your average girl
I change from day to day.

I like nascar, outdoors and things most
Girls don't like to do
But I'm not gonna change my ways just because of you.

I am who I am because that's who I want to be
I don't try to be like others so they will want to be like me.
I am who I am cause that's how God made me to be.
So go out there and be yourself for all and others to see
But just remember..there is no one else like me. •mandy•

Dear canada girl aka cri

 I really don't know why you seem to be more concerned with my life and my instagram, Twitter,  and blog than you do with the guy that' you've had an internet fling with for the past several years. Its sad that you are jealous of our friendship but yet you have yet to meet him. Dont tell someone for three yrs your going to meet him, fly him up, fly down and see him and come up with an excuse everytime. Its none of my business, but you can't keep catfishing ppl. You wanted to meet me when you said you were coming down. I'm flattered sweet heart but you need to be more interested in meeting your fling than you are me. And I'm also flattered that you like and then unlike my pictures on instagram. But cut out the stalker ness. Down in the south we would call you crazy. So be real if you really like J then meet him. Feel free to respond. I don't mind really. :)

Games

This says it all. No need to play games. Just be real. Dont lie. And be honest.

You know the one where you call
But you act like you never called me
When you see me at a bar
and you act like you never saw me
When you're dancing with him
and you're looking at me
Or I'm holding her, and I'm hoping you see
Or the one where you don't kiss me
Then you tell me that you miss me

All of these games, we play
I can't even keep 'em all straight
Do we mean what we say
We got lines crossed all over the place, yeah
I can't tell if I'm winning or losing
Somebody tell me what are we doing
Nobody ever comes out on top
Tell me are we ever gonna stop
Playing these games

The one where you act all surprised
Like you didn't know I'd be at the party
The way you make sure it gets back to me
That you got with somebody
The way you wake up, say it was just a mistake
But you always leave something over at my place
So I gotta bring it back
Now baby why you gotta be like that

All of these games, we play
I can't even keep 'em all straight
Do we mean what we say
We got lines crossed all over the place, yeah
I can't tell if I'm winning or losing
Somebody tell me what are we doing
Nobody ever comes out on top
Tell me are we ever gonna stop
Playing these games

This break-up, make-up,hot and cold thing got me dizzy
You don't want me til I got somebody with me
It's gonna kill me
Baby tell me, what am I supposed to do with you

And all of these games, we play
I can't even keep 'em all straight
Do we mean what we say
We got lines crossed all over the place, yeah
I can't tell if I'm winning or losing
Somebody tell me what are we doing
Nobody ever comes out on top
Tell me are we ever gonna stop
Playing these games
All of these games

Something your not

You know what I don't understand? How ppl are so fake. How they lie to make themselves look good. How do you live with yourself and have to keep up with so many lies and fake..ness. it could be a reason you can't be happy. Sure you a nice and sweet person but enough with lying to yourself and others. Trust me.. I can see right through you. Be yourself for once.

Do not disturb

I know I havnt written on this thing in a long time. I've just been thinking a lot here lately and I'm thinking about putting a "Do not disturb" sticker on my heart and mind. I'm so tired of getting crapped on. I do so much for ppl and I have a big heart and I think ppl some times expects so much out of me. I'm tired of being my self and meeting people and they talk to me and act like they like me and want to see me so bad and then up and stop talking to me. Why play games. If your so scared to begin with,  then don't try to even conversate with me and get to know me. Me get to know you. I dont play games. I have a big heart and I will do anything for anyone but at the same time I don't take crap from anyone. I'm honest and blunt. I will tell it like it is. I'm not going to be your go to girl. Your not gonna talk to me monday-friday and then disappear on the weekend. Why do guys think its ok tondo that. Its not just guys I know. Its girls to. Its someone's heart and mind your playing with. Dont say your gonna meet someone and talk to them and never hold true to your word. Your being a coward or your lying about something one. I just want to find someone who will like me for me. Who won't play games. Who is honest and won't lie and pretend to be someone their not. I'm just a real girl. Who deserves to be treated like you would want to be treated.

100% real

You know what's rare these days? Someone (preferably guys) who knows how to carry on a real conversation. Every now and then I will get these guys who want to meet me and we txt or chat but all they want is a hook up. Sorry I'm not like that. I want to get to know you and have a meaningful conversation about things. No I don't want to hook up with you, no I don't want to send nasty pictures to you nor do I want to talk dirty with you. I want to know what you like and don't like. I want to know what your goals are. What kind of music you like and what are your interests. I want to get to the point where we can cut up and chat about stupid random stuff but then be serious.  To me that's what a relationship is. Being connected and able to share your rants and how your day was. Its the guys that just want hook upa that later say I just can't find a good girl. Well I've only met and dated one guy out of the only 3 guys I've dated that knows how to carry on a real conversation. We just click and can talk about anything and everything!  That's what I want. Someone who is 100% real. Even my ex husband didn't carry on conversations. It was always about his rants and his day. Never how was your day. I know not everyone is ready to settle down and get married right away. I'm not either. I guess I just want things different this time when its my time to meet someone. I only dated my ex husband 5 months and then he proposed!  That was the biggest mistake. We never argued and he was shy and didn't talk. Maybe there are a few of you guys out there who wants what I want.